Florida Summers Are Like Living on the Surface of the Sun

I’ve been running around lately doing a lot of fun things like babysitting, birthday parties, Fun Friday pool volleyball, and a second breakfast with pals after I work out. I’ve also been eating disgustingly healthfully except for a newfound obsession with sweet tea. OMG! HOOK IT TO MY VEINS!!!!

I’ve been sleeping well all night and waking with the birds, been in a good mood, have a new-ish looking bedroom with our little remodel in progress and I’m sitting here early in the morning with a perfectly restful no-commitment day ahead of me. All these things are great.

But…

I swear to god if this steamy summer heat doesn’t let up soon I’m going to lose my last shreds of sanity. 

Jacksonville has been experiencing bizarrely humid weather this summer. It always feels like it’s 3958569549504 degrees and I have no room to complain because I wanted and chose to live in this area except I’m going to do it anyway.

Every day feels like I’m living in an armpit. A stinky, dripping wet, sweat-soaked armpit. Being outdoors is like having a dog pant all over you all day long.

The air is thick, heavy, and almost unbreathable. Sometimes I think I might want to hang out in hell where the temperature is most likely cooler. Oh, and did I mention that everything is moist all the time? The grass, the trees, the driveway your car, your clothes, your patio furniture, YOU - and don't get me started on how that soggy air makes my hair look.  

I’m ready to say f*ck it, bring on fall, chilly 65-degree temperatures, an occasional light sweater, and pumpkin-flavored everything. Enough with the gross sauna imitation, Mother Nature.

Woe.

Big Bill getting some air on the diving board. Not too shabby for an old dude.