When You’re An Autumn Person Waiting For Summer to End
It’s fall in Florida, and do you know what that means? It means the heat was still oppressive until a few days ago, and life in Florida was exactly the same except for a few dead palms that fell off our tree. I was ready to speak with the supervisor of summer about ushering in cooler temperatures, and don’t get me started on how my regular wardrobe of shorts and tank tops was looking ratty from the buckets of sweat that poured off me whenever I was outside for longer than three seconds.
My brain could not process how it could be fall when the temperatures were still set at broiling and tropical. It’s like “Is it May? June? July? WTF is going on?????? If summer is over, why aren’t you shivering?” (There were times I thought I was going to DIE in Pittsburgh because I was so cold between the months of October (when it snowed) and May (when it has been known to snow.)
The other day, I was in a neighborhood pool doing my own little aquafit routine, probably looking ridiculous bobbing up and down to a song in my head, while thinking, “Swimming in October is nice, but I’d like to wear a sweater! Or at least a short-sleeve top I’m not roasting in and maybe have a day or two where my hair doesn’t look like a humidified whacked-out mess.”
Well, my friends, dreams do come true!
When I woke up this morning, it was 62 degrees. The bugs have returned to hell where they belong, my pumpkin spice candles, hand lotion, and air freshener are no longer on standby and today feels like “wear a sweater or sweatshirt in the morning and regret it in the afternoon weather” which is an improvement over the “you’re probably going to die if you’re outside” weather we’ve been having. (Don’t you love the mystery of a sweatshirt? When I’m wearing a sweatshirt, am I wearing a bra? Mmmmmm…. Did I throw it on over what I wore to bed last night? You never know.)
Hot weather woes aside, I like living in Florida. Most of the time, it’s heavenly, with constant sunshine and a laid-back beach vibe. And I certainly don’t miss the potential for six months of snow like we had in Pennsylvania, but—and I never thought I would say this—summer overstayed its welcome this year.
But here we are with cooler temperatures! I look forward to switching up my complaining as I trade the discomfort of frizzy hair, chafing, and boob sweat for the discomfort of leggings with skinny, biting elastic, dry skin, fighting b*tches at Home Goods for holiday trash none of us need, and feeling envious at how other women look cute in flannel, while I’m walking around with an I-can’t-find-my-ax vibe.
Happy Fall Y’all!!